awesmazings | Voicemail

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You've reached Jimmy Two-Shoes! I'm not around right now, but leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can!

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well the value of stocks fluctuates according to the principles of supply and demand and how well the company is doing so the point of the game is to buy as much as you can when the price is low and then sell at the highest peak and
like
look
i was thirteen last time i interacted with the stock market and while i fucking owned that shit like nothing has ever been owned before
like seriously i literally possessed the entire goddamn planet basically
i also probably didnt understand the economic principles behind it as well as i thought i did
all i know is gaming the market made me hella cash hella fast

[...god he barely understood any of that but it sounds cool.]

i think the reason there arent things like that here is cause like
people can make their own money with meowth and persians using pay day or whatever
so there's really no point
like if everybody cared to own one and trained it up enough they prolly wouldnt have to work ever

well that just takes all the fun out of it

exactly! thats why I work at the circus

yeah you mentioned that
what do you do are you like the guy that gets shot out of a cannon or what

naaah
well i guess i could if i wanted
im a jack-of-all-trades, joker- the ringleader- says
so i can fill pretty much any act that we need
im kinda like his right hand guy

thats cool
what kind of acts do you do
i ask out of genuine curiosity since im not sure ive ever been to an actual big tent show circus

balancing acts, juggling...and my friend ron was

he was teaching me how to throw knives

[There's a weird gap, there. Maybe Jimmy's thumb just slipped.]

[Whether or not the gap strikes Dave as odd, it's not like he's going to bring it up.]

youre not a clown on top of all that are you

naah, id say joker's the clown, not me

haha just checking
my friend john
the way you talk reminds me of him a little actually
anyway that kid totally hated clowns it was ridiculous

john huh?
I had a friend here named john too actually
he was really cool. one of the first people who talked to me when i got here actually
never asked him about his stance on clowns tho

what a crazy and random coincidence
johns are probably one of those universal constants though
you know like shitty soda
and frogs

you sure about that? the soda we have in miseryville is pretty awesmazing if you ask me

[NOT REALLY it makes you breathe literal fire. I mean, that's cool if you're into that.]

that may be dude that may be
but you cant tell me there isnt subpar soda in there along with the good shit
especially in a place named after literal misery

haha, youve got a point! but I think im prolly just more open minded when it comes to offbrand sodas

yeah you could be
im not really a soda kind of guy in the first place
it seems like that and lemonade are the sugary vending machine concoctions of choice around here though
i mean i FOUND apple juice but it just doesnt look as popular? i dont really get it

yeah, people seem to like those! its either that or like, just plain water in the vending machines
do you like apple juice better?

i like apple juice more than i like most sentient beings

pfff why do you like it so much?

i dunno i never really thought about it
i mean i like gross processed shit like bottled juice across the board so maybe thats why
but that wouldnt explain why i like it more than soda or anything
i guess its just one of those arbitrary taste things i cant even justify by implying my obviously sophisticated palate is superior to all others
like why do people have favorite colors its not like particular wavelengths of reflected light have any more aesthetic value than the others

...well i like chocolate a lot, and i dont really have a reason either, so there prolly isnt really a reason
maybe our tastebuds are just different

probably
im sure thereve been scientific studies to back up our well researched and peer reviewed hypothesis on the subject

maybe if you spread the word about apple juice enough, theyll start putting more kinds of juice in the machine!1!

well shit see you man dave striders out to lay some GOSPEL TRUTH down on the populace

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awesmazings - 2015-11-24 01:58 (UTC) - Expand

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